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On November 20, Daniel Negreanu posted on his regular blog on fullcontactpoker.com. While this usually wouldn’t be newsworthy, his closing statements may leave you scratching your head. Below are excerpts from this blog, which you can read in its entirety by clicking here

In the first questionable part of Daniel’s blog, he posts a transcript of an exchange between himself and a waiter at a steakhouse at the Palms, with Negreanu attempting to order a festive beverage.

“Got Heineken Light?”
“No.”
“I’ll just take a Heineken then.”
“No Heineken either, but we have a beer that tastes kind of like Heineken?”
“Forget, what else you got, how about a Corona?”
“No we have random beer #1, we have Bass, Amstel Light, etc.”
“So you have no beer I want, how about a glass of wine. You have Santa Margherita Pinot Grigio?”
“No, sorry.”

Where to begin……

Ok, first off, we have Daniel starting off asking for a light beer, which could be forgiven…..had he just left the Betty Ford Center. This is not to mention that his second and third choice of brew are Dutch and Mexican, respectively. The man is Canadian, and Canadian men love their beer. Why is he asking for imported beer?? At least ask for something from Molson or Labatt (No, Canadian beer is NOT deemed imported, regardless of the sign above it at the beer store). THEN…..when he can’t find something suitable for himself on the beer front, he asks about fucking wine! You’re at a steakhouse man. If none of the beers sound appealing, tell the waiter to surprise you with one. A crappy beer is far more manly than even the classiest wine. This is reminiscent of that high maintenance girlfriend who bitches at the waiter because he forgot the pineapple garnish on her strawberry daiquiri. Just drink it, shut up and eat your steak, which better not be fucking well done (I guarantee he isn’t eating a well done steak, more on that later). These are not the first seeds of doubt that Daniel has planted about his manliness, but this might be the first sign of a plant growing from said seeds.

Then, we move on to the later part of his blog, where he really raises eyebrows and promises news in his next blog:

“…the next blog I write is going to be very different than anything I’ve ever written before. I considered writing it now, but I wanted to give it some time so I can really think about what it is I’m saying and what the best way to say it is. It’s kind of a good news/bad news blog in a sense, although I prefer to see it as a very good thing and a positive step in my life. I’d explain further but the only way to do that would be to just write the blog now and I’m not going to do that.”

Uhhhh…..

Does this not sound like a massive weight is going to be lifted off of his shoulders? I can think of an announcement that some dudes make which makes them feel great to finally get off their chest, but it also usually results in their father never speaking to them again. Come to think of it…..Daniel has been known to really praise Patrik Antonius…..to the point where people present become uncomfortable. There are also numerous sources stating that Negreanu is a vegetarian (one of the more telltale signs). AAAAANNNDDDD……..we have also heard rumblings that he’s married, but we have heard nary a mention of this “wife” of his. Add all this to the fact that he’s been known to listen to “relaxing sounds, like ocean waves” at the poker table, and you end up with absolutely no need to read his next blog, as you already know what the gist of it will be. It’s not that far from Vegas to San Fran, is it?

Play with Daniel at PokerStars.com - Canadian Poker

In what can only be described as the biggest tease since that time you thought that stripper was coming home with you, immigration officials have ended deportation proceedings against professional poker player/jackass Shawn Sheikhan. This means that contrary to previous reports, Sheikhan (at least for now) will not be returned to Iran where he can’t annoy us.

The attempts to rid North America of Sheikhan were based on a 1995 conviction involving charges of sexual battery and annoyance or molestation of a child. However, the U.S. Immigration Court Judge stated that the U.S. Department of Homeland Security hadn’t supplied the court with adequate documentation about the California conviction for it to be determined that a deportable offense had taken place.

As if being a douchebag wasn’t enough, Sheikhan served nine months in the clink followed by five years of probation for the 1995 conviction. However, Sheikhan has always maintained his innocence of these charges O.J.-style. These facts alone should be enough to ship Sheikhan out, air-mail.

The Department of Homeland Security has until December 17 to appeal the ruling and resume efforts of deportation, but we’d settle for just keeping him off of television where he can’t bother us. Or at least keeping him away from school playgrounds.

Pow! Joe is back with his latest episode.

David Degenyamine Benyamine is one of the most popular ultra high stakes online poker player in todays game. He is a regular at all the major Full Tilt games which include HORSE $1,000-$2,000, Pot Limit Omaha $300-$600 and basically any other big game that is being played at the time. He is also dating one hot hot poker babe Erica “show us your tits, wait she already did that” Schoenberg.

Here is what David typed in to the Full Tilt chat:

David Benyamine: good luck
David Benyamine: im done on full tilt
David Benyamine: finished 4 me
David Benyamine: 6.5 million loser
David Benyamine: got myword

The $6.5 million loss could be an exaggeration since he is up $5 million this year in Pot Limit Omaha alone. But he isnt called David Degenyamine for no reason.

Related Links: Full Tilt Poker Review -Erica Schoenberg

As if conquering MySpace, creating an online poker site (Tilapoker.com), getting naked for photoshoots, and releasing crappy music wasn’t enough, Tila Tequila has found a new way to put her face (among other parts) where you can see it!

As you may have already heard, MTV has a new reality show starring Tila called “A Shot At Love With Tila Tequila”. While at first glance, this sounds like a lame version of the Bachelorette, there is actually more to this than just some chick making guys dance like puppets who are trying to earn a rose. Tila is obviously the girl that 16 dumbass guys are to gain the affection of, but here’s the kicker: There are also 16 girls attempting the same thing!

While you’ve probably already had wet dreams fantasizing about Tila partaking in lesbian activities, settle yourself down. Keep in mind, this is MTV, and lewdness is no doubt being kept far below an R rating. We’d like to be able to update you on how the show (which just aired episode 5) is unfolding, but we just can’t bring ourselves to watch this nonsense, regardless of how hot the bisexual Tila or the 16 muff munchers are. At least her pictures don’t require the pushing of the mute button.

Tila Poker - Tila Tequilia bio + pics

The last few episodes of High Stakes Poker season 4 on GSN; features some of the biggest high limit players in the world. The game has a required straddle and a min-buy-in of $500,000. According to Doyle, the only person in the game not playing above his bankroll is some fruity French guy Guy Laliberte. Guy is the founder and owner of Cirque Du Soleil.

The latest episode on high stakes poker shows Doyle Brunson getting bluffed by the man that wants to be the worlds biggest bluffer aka Jamie Gold. Note: Each played started the hand with around $500,000 and blinds are $300-$600-$1200 with a $100 ante.

Here is the hand summary:

Gold is UTG+1, calls $1200 with

9♠7♠ Brunson right to his left calls,

10♠8♠ Esfandiari calls,

Q♦8♦ Farha calls $900 out of the SB with

9♣6♠ Benyamine calls $600 from the BB with

A♥3♥ Antonius checks with

2♥2♦

Flop:

K♠4♠J♦

4x checked to Brunson, who bets $6k into the $8k pot with
Everyone folds to Gold who calls with

Turn

A♠

Gold checks
Brunson bets $25k into the $20k pot.

Gold raises by $100k to $125k.
Brunson asks: “Are you gonna show it to me, if i throw it away?”

Could Doyle Brunson really have thought Jamie had the queen high flush? The jack high flush most likely is not plausible, knowing how Jamie plays, he would definitely bet his pair and flush draw on the flop. So I guess Doyle figured “the worlds great bluffer” really had the nuts this time and folded his 3rd nut flush.

Here is what Barry Greenstein had to say about the hand: After the flush hand with Doyle and Jamie, Dolye leaned over and asked me what I thought Jamie had. I told him I thought Jamie had an Ace high straight. When Doyle told me he could beat that, I told him I wouldn’t have folded. Doyle said, “I know by the way Jamie was acting that he thought he had the nuts, but I hope he didn’t misjudge his own strength.” Later when Jamie tells Doyle what he had, Doyle gets steamed up and costs me money with a play he wouldn’t ordinarily make.

Our favorite professional poker Joe is back with a brand new episode. Episode 5 features Joe going through some tough times. In one day he missed 3 flush draws, 2 str8 draws, 8 over card draws, and unlimited gutshot draws, poor guy. Luckily he was able to borrow some bills from players he use to crush.

As you’ve no doubt already heard, AbsolutePoker.com has been in a bit of hot water over the past few weeks. With rumours of a “super-user” account rampant, shit has really hit the fan with confirmation that this kind of scam truly exists. Reportedly, Scott Tom had been using this super-user to “observe” at tables in which a player by the name of “PotRipper” (named AJ Green?) would be playing tournaments and tell him what hole cards the other players had.

With this obvious advantage, they would take down massive amounts of cash and split the winnings. It has been claimed that AP security had suspected something some time ago, but were assured that the owners of the site were just testing the system, and to stop worrying about it (Translation: Take this thousand bucks, and shut the fuck up). The amount of money gleaned using this method was originally said to be around the $700,000 mark, but reports have surfaced saying the decimal might be one place too far to the left. That’s right, people are saying up to 7 million dollars have been scammed this way. An internal audit is underway to find out the exact amount.

In related news, on Sept. 3^rd, a private jet carrying Scott Tom, his pregnant girlfriend, and 2-3 million in cash caught on fire at the San Jose Juan Santamaria International Airport in Costa Rica prior to takeoff. AP confirms the passengers were on the plane destined for Columbia, but deny that the presence of the greenbacks. No word on whether the cash was in sacks with dollar signs on them.

Green’s subtlety is also something to be commended, as he bought a house in Escazu and paid Randy Moss-style (straight cash, homey). He then invested $100,000 in AbsolutePoker and became a shareholder, and still no one thought to wonder how the fuck this schmo making $50K a year came up with this kind of loot. You have to wonder if Bryan Micon works for AP.

Related Links: Absolute Poker Review - Source: Point-Spreads.com